a Beltane walk & talk (trigger warning: this is a blunt, sex-positive post)

Out of nowhere on a walk through our city neighborhood, the Hero threw this one at me.

"I celebrated death when Grandma died and on Halloween. If Beltane is the opposite of Halloween, then do I do the opposite on Beltane? What is the opposite?"

Passing on your religion to your kids is hard because it requires making the subtle obvious quickly and on the fly. Thankfully I'm Pagan and flowers and vulvas have material similarities. I donno how the Catholics do it.

I said, "You experienced death when Grandma died. Because we celebrate it on Halloween, we remembered when Grandma died that this is a sacred experience, part of what makes us human beings, part of what makes us whole, holy. So on Beltane we celebrate the creation moment of a life, which is the opposite of the destruction moment of a life. But you won't create life on Beltane, just like you don't die on Halloween."

He said, "How are lives created?"

Instantly I was aware of every person on the street standing within potential hearing range. I bent down and whispered, "You remember what sex is, right?"

"No."

Following a whispered explanation that related what the entire natural world is doing in springtime to what we grownups do privately when they're in love, I ended, "So on Beltane we celebrate that."

Hero excitedly shouted, "Oh, I remember now! You and Dad love each other and that's how you put your bodies together to make me!"

Me: "Yes."

Hero: "Well I'm really celebrating that because if you didn't do it then I wouldn't be here."

Me: "I'm very glad you are here, too."

Hero: "Yeah 'cause if I weren't then you wouldn't have a hero in the world."

He is really my hero and he knows it.

I'm immensely grateful that our religion gives us a context for viewing sex as sacred. We have symbols and songs and language for it all; I don't have to come up with my own analogies.

Hero wanted me to sing a traditional Beltane song most of the way back home. I did. He could be heard saying "AGAIN!" in between each round. I clung to that, hoping people saw that I was parenting and not drunk.

In an attempt to escape this humilation, I said, "You know, some people called Chasidic Jews think a woman's singing voice is sacred the same way her private parts are, so they say she should only sing in her house for her family, just like we only let our families see us naked."

Hero responded with visible distress. "That would be horrible! Then no one else would get to enjoy it!"

I didn't know if he meant singing or sex. After thinking for a moment about whether or not to ask him, I did, very quietly. He said, "BOTH!"

I took that to mean he understands the spirit of Beltane.